adjustment

So being a new mommy and working full time is truly a workout.  Theeeeen to top it all off I just got an email from my SW on Thursday the this little Prince has 3 of his older siblings back in the system because grandma couldn’t care for them.  They are, get this, 2, 3, and 4.  Yep and the baby is 1.  That was one busy momma.  I, of course, said yes.  Not because I’m crazy and think I could actually go from single to mommy of 4 without any problems, but because I want Korbin to know I tried.  My home currently isn’t licensed for 4 and I would have to move, but if that is what is needed to keep siblings together then this is what I would do.  I would want someone to do that for me if I was in the system and had siblings floating around.  It may or may not work out.  But this is the second time they have been removed from mom’s care so they will not be returning.  I would just need to know what led grandma to relinquish care.  If she’s 80 and ailing and not able to physically care for them then that’s fine, but if they are the spawn of Satan then that’s another thing.  I would care to assume they are not drug babies, yet moving around a lit can really mess with a person, especially a little person.  I will pursue this more on Monday, but thought it was an interesting turn of events.  I always knew I wanted 4, but didn’t anticipate it happening withing months of having one.  So, we will see.  I leave this completely in God’s hands and whatever happens, happens.

As far as Korbin’s adjustment is going.  Well, things have been better and better each day.  Last week we had an asthma scare and had to take him to the ER for breathing treatments, chest X-rays, antibiotics and the works.  He’s doing great now.  I am back to work full-time but I am able to be in his classroom a good 3-5 hours a day and I think that helps with our adjustment and bonding.  He gets all excited when I enter his classroom and he starts cheering and clapping and screaming  and runs over all smiles.  It’s the cutest thing and I absolutely love it.  It’s even funny when he’s mad (apparently he does not like this ‘no’ word I reference), he’ll fuss and say, ‘mommamommamomma.’  It’s too cute.  Well, it’s not always cute, but you get my drift.  I think we are both quite smitten with each other.  Today he has been catching up on his sleep since he is still a little weary at school and he will only sleep in one to two 50 min blocks of time.

More to follow, and pictures too.  I have been trying to take foster friendly photos (you know, the ones that are not full frontal face shots, since he isn’t officially mine yet), but those are hard since he’s so darn cute.  I’ll keep trying.

WooHoo!!!

Wow, what a day yesterday was.  Okay, here’s the lowdown.  Originally we (everyone involved) agreed to an 11:00 pickup on Tuesday, then i was to go see the social workers at 11:30.  Well that time didn’t work for everyone so we changed the meeting time of the social workers to 1:30 which would mean a 1:00 pickup.  The social workers were to inform the foster mom.  Well she called me at 12:15 to see where I was.  We called back to say we were on our way for the 1:00 pickup.  She thought it was 12 and by the time I got to the social worker they had that is was 11 and thought I had already left.  Curiouser and Curiouser.  But here’s the real kicker….she had her mom bring him and when they arrived I figured it wasn’t her because there was no car seat.  She had him in a comforter buckled up in the back seat!!!  She then gets out of the car and says, are you the ones here for the baby.  Then the outfit he is in (remember, I’m kind of a snob about this), is not the outfit I sent for him.  And when I eventually change him the pants are 3-6 months and the onesie is 6-9 months.  He has baby cleavage and an elastic waistband mark.  It was so unbelievable!!  And of course he’s in shoes that are a size too small.  I put on shoes that actually fit and in his car seat he kept wiggling his feet around while laughing. 

So, on to the social worker meeting.  I signed placement papers which pretty much explained the monthly stipend and the visitation info with the bio-mom.  We (my mom was there at pickup time), explained the lack of a carseat and the uber small cloathing and she made a formal complaint to investigate the lack of a carseat.  Good, at least someone is doing their job.  So the visitation arrangement is every Sunday from 2-4 but apparently she gets fidgety after an hour.  (I know, after an HOUR, if I hadn’t seen my child all week 59 minutes would not fill that void.)  So, I’ll likely bring a book and hopefully they have a seperate seating area so I can let her have her time and be done with it.  The social worker shared that Korbin was taken into custody on January 4 so this is exactly 6 months coming up.  Because he is so little she will be given another 6months (of services such as section 8 and food stamps) to get herself in order.  If she misses 3 visits her visitation will be discountinued.  I know it’s not nice, but I’m anticipating her failure, again.  I actually am just hoping she feels comfortable with me caring for her child and she can tell herself he will be okay and that she doesn’t have to fight for him anymore.  She’s not putting up a huge fight to begin with, but she still is in the picture.

Now, on to the evening.  Korbin was such a toddler yesterday.  He was into everything and in such a spicy little mood.  I think he totally got the gravity of the move, because he was more temperamental and having little tantrums on and off when things wouldn’t go his way.  He also was exhausted because the mother of the foster mom who dropped him off said he hadn’t napped all day.  So he slept for an hour at the social worker meeting and then fell asleep at home at 6:30 and when I went to move him to his bed 2 hours later (I know, why the heck did I wait so long), he woke up.  I got him a bottle and he kind or fell back to sleep then by 9:15 he was fully awake.  By 11 (at night!) he was showing signs of sleepiness so I gave him a bath, another bottle and he was sort of asleep then he kept trying to clap his hands and pull his hair to keep himself awake.  By this time, I was EXHAUSTED.  I was so excited earlier in the morning that I barely slept, but by this hour I was so over being awake.  I finally just laid him down, frustrated at myself for doing such a stupid attempt at a schedule, and he started crying.  He fussed for like a min and then I just crawled out of the room since he was crawling around his bed fussing and trying to fight sleep.  Yes, you heard me correctly, I crawled out of the room.  I didn’t want him to see me walk away and cause some form of distorted bonding.  Last time he had his overnights he had a rougher first day.  I think it’s just the getting used to all of it.  Plus it’s really hard to know what his morning consisted of so I cannot base an afternoon and evening based on ‘I wonder’s.’  Oh, well, today will be better.  Right now the prince is asleep, of course, and I will have a relaxing morning of coffee and laundry. 

Until tomorrows adventures begin…Melanie out.